Wednesday, 9 March 2011

The blubbering controller learning to trust again....

Tonight I blubbered all the way down the motorway as God humbled me and made me realise how my attempt at trying to 'control things' had got me in a twist over the last 2 weeks. Worries about the future - what am I doing next year? Worries about my health. Worries about relationships.....Each time I think I've surrendered something, other things come a long and I learn once again how I need God's help in trusting Him about the future and not planning so much...

As I drove down the motorway from visiting a Bible College I felt God remind me that He knows everything. He knows the number of hairs on my head, He knows what I'll be doing in the next 10 hours and where I'll be in the next 10 years. He knows what I need. He knows me better than I know myself. So why O why do I feel the need to control and analyse and figure out everything!!!! How gracious He is at persisting to teach me to trust over and over again!

I'm growing to understand that surrender seems to be a life long thing and I think I've realised there is always more to surrender, always more that God can do to bring us to greater dependance on Him so there is less of Me and more of Him. It would be so much easier if we could learn this in one full swoop, in a blink of an eye, like a flash of lightning. But life doesn't work that way and maybe the process is essential to understanding ourselves and God in greater measure.

So as I put the my blubbering controller self to bed I can rest assured that GOD IS IN CONTROL and everything is going to be OK because He has got me right in His hand and that is the safest place to be.

2 comments:

  1. Hi Pippa! I was thinking just along these lines last weekend. Somehow I convince myself that actually I know better than God, hence I don't allow myself to fully trust in Him with ALL of my life; instead I slowly surrender day by day.

    I was reading Psalm 18 v30 'As for God, his way is perfect; the word of the LORD is flawless'. He is absolutely perfect and knows best for us, and He never lies, so we can trust all His promises in His word. Then in the same Psalm v32 'It is God who arms me with strength and makes my way perfect'. If we let Him, He makes our way perfect - not how WE want it, but how He sees best - and gives us the strength to go His way.

    Exciting to see how God is doing amazing work in you - you are precious! xx

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  2. Love that passage from Psalm 18. thanks for that Jenny! Really helpful. Pips x

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